KNIGHTRIDERS

This week, Matt and John discuss the merits of George A. Romero's motorcycle joust film, Knightriders.

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BLOOD LAKE!

This week, Matt and John discuss the 1987 SOV film, BLOOD LAKE.  We feel the film is worth talking about, because there is a man in a hat named Tiny Frazier and a lot of water skiiing.

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Thanks for listening
-J. Moret

Trailer Triumph: Godzilla (2014)

We all know that Hollywood loves remaking things. In the past couple of years we've gotten mediocre remakes such as Total Recall, Evil Dead, Old Boy and Carrie to name a few. It makes it hard to get excited for remakes when so few are even watchable. This summer we'll see the release of Godzilla. This is the second time Hollywood has tried to make a Godzilla film, the first being a major flop. This time around the studio hired talented, award winning actors such as Bryan Cranston, Sally Hawkins, Ken Wantanabe and Elizabeth Olsen and they got director Gareth Edwards, most famous for the Godzilla inspired flick Monsters. With that kind of talent it's easy to say: "How could they screw that up?!". Well, after seeing countless disappointing movies that feature amazing casts/directors/writers I'm a little hesitant to make that exclamation anymore.

Yesterday, any doubts I've had about this film were completely crushed like a Japanese building under the mighty foot of the King of the Monsters. The second trailer was just released and it took my breath away. It was seemingly everything I want from a modern day Godzilla movie: dark, destructive and utterly terrifying! Sure the Showa series (Godzilla movies made between 1954- 1975) are classics, the Heisei series (1984-1995) were interesting and the Millennium series (1999-2004) were fun but none of them came close to the original film. The original film in my opinion plays out like a horror movie. It is truly terrifying. An uncontrollable, seemingly unstoppable, mutated creature utterly destroys a metropolis like it's nothing. The original wasn't a joke. It wasn't a family movie. It wasn't just two guys in rubber suits beating each other up. It was a reflection of the horrors inflicted on a nation. It was fear. Fear of the unknown effects of a nuclear bomb. Fear of the monster that could strike at any time and the scars it left in it's wake. I take the first movie seriously and from the looks of the new trailer so do the makers of this new adaptation.

This looks like a disaster film of epic proportions and I for one can't wait to be scared again by the terror of Godzilla. Watch the trailer above and get ready for total destruction of the box office on May 16th of this year.

-T. Reinert

WWF SURVIVOR SERIES of 1990

This week, Matt and John discuss the Colisseum Video release of the 1990 World Wrestling Federation Survivor Series.  We feel its important to discuss pro-wrestlers fake enlisting in the army to serve in Desert Shield and Jimmy Snuka's drug problem.

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Thanks for listening,
J. Moret

Review: HEAVY METAL MASSACRE

Directed by David Defalco, Steven Defalco and Ottaviano
1989
SOV art.
Bootleg DVD ripped from the VHS - obtained on iOffer.com

Raging guitar rock from the late 1980s, giant bangs, hilariously slow pans and inaudible dialogue are just a few of the things that I love about this movie.

The Rock and Roll Lifestyle is tough, you know.  The hair is complicated, the mustaches are smelly and murder is ALWAYS pinned on you.  That's why Rico accidentally runs into the camera when he's getting pulled away by the cops.  It's also why strobe-light shots of black-light posters are on-screen every ten minutes.

Bobbi Young is so tough that he can just simply stare at the camera and make it go out of focus.  His "huge" house is a den of iniquity.  Drugs, screaming metal, chain link-fences, random pallets and abandoned cars are just some of the great stuff he's got.

Then, Bobbi gets all creepy, handcuffs a prostitute to a pallet, and then sledge-hammers her belly until a tiny bit of blood is dripped on the ground.  Damn.  And, I was just starting to like Bobbi.

Luckily two whack detectives are sitting in a guy's basement that is a stand-in for the police station, working on cracking the case. They hit Rico ("The Shithead Scumbag") but are convinced he's not their main.

Slow-motion green sepia-toned Bobbi gets some money for cocaine, and a bag is relayed and oh who cares.  I can't tell what's happening and it doesn't matter.  The interactions amongst actors is wonderful.  Bobbi Young is perhaps the Robert DeNiro of the SOV world.  Every line he delivers is gold.  The filmmaking has that unmistakeable SOV quality that you'll only find within the Nick Millard, Wally Koz crowd.  And, it has metal soundtrack, which I'm convinced can make any movie great.  Where a film like Death Nurse is perhaps 30% padding, I'm gonna go ahead and say this movie matches or even tops that.  Its' nearly perfect.

There is something very special about this film.  It is obviously filmed completely within the confines of the rock scene in Rhode Island.  It has all the trappings of Rocktober Blood or Rock N' Roll Nightmare, but none of the polish.  So, instead, you get some type of home-made nightmare metal fan film.  Kaleidoscope shots, negative color and other thirty second shots of a stuffed owl's eyes are just a few of the things you have to look forward to.  Perhaps one of the least professional or ambitious of the SOVs I've seen, it stands out for the pure disaster that it is.  And, there is not a dull moment.  Bravo, Defalco, Defalco and Ottaviano.

Before you Rock:

• Gather some fun-loving metal fans
• Grow your hair out.
• Listen to some Iron Maiden.

The Goods:
This is a hard one to come by.  You won't find it on Amazon or Ebay very often, and if it does show up, it's crazy expensive.  I found a guy on iOffer.com who had done a bootleg.  He did a nice job with the art (It's the VHS art, all blown up and stretched).  The quality of the transfer is bad, but I can only imagine that it probably looks about as good as the original.  Well worth your money.

-J. Moret